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1 day until a nice long break

Didn’t really have a chance to update yesterday.

Weds night, Heather, Vlad and I watched the first three episodes of Lost Season 3 and finished off that six part “mini-season” last night. I will say the episodes hold up a lot better when watched all at once rather than one a week. I remember those were the weakest part when I originally saw them.

A showed up about Midnight Weds Eve/Thurs morning. We didn’t get much sleep, and I was exhausted all yesterday. She’s very touchy feely and we all know I’m not. She likes to wrestle and I’m always afraid of hurting her. She really likes to cuddle and I, well…I feel uncomfortable about it but I eventually reciprocate because I don’t want to hurt her feelings.

Here’s a snippet from that early morning convo.

Her: “I really like cuddling with you.”

Me: “Well thank you. That’s very sweet.”

Her: You know I don’t cuddle with anyone else, right?

Me: It’s never even crossed my mind actually.

Her: “Do you like cuddling with me?”

Me: “It’s not unpleasant.”

Her: “But you like cuddling with me, right?”

Me: “It’s not unpleasant.”

Her: “Say you like cuddling with me.”

Me: Fine. I like cuddling with you.

Her: Yay! *smooch*

Me: ….

I don’t know. Maybe it’s just me and my relationship phobia, but situations like this weird me out. I have no problem with being friends with people or being friends with benefits with people. But this? Letting someone spend the night when they can’t make it home and them insisting on sleeping with you rather than in different beds. Or lounging around cuddling? These are events that generally imply “more than friends” to me. If it was any of my other female friends doing this, I’d have a talk with them. Or if I was reciprocating with anyone else, I know my friends would give me a ton of shit for it. But because A says she does FWB and casual sex and things pretty close to how I do, I just tell myself she feels more comfortable with me for some reason. I could be wrong, and I know Heather thinks I am, but for once this is a conversation I don’t want to broach because I don’t want this to be a situation where I am misreading things because I have commitment issues.

Thursday I got up and had to go to work while A was still showering and getting ready. I lost a ton of work Weds. when my computer crashed and went in a bit early to redo it before my Friday afternoon deadline. I left work at 11:30am for out exceptionally boring work Xmas party. I got home about 3:30 and watched Resident Evil before taking a nap (partially from no sleep the might before and partially from a massive sugar crash.) Then I played some Nights: Journey Into Dreams.

Nights is the most beautiful game I’ve seen on any current system: Wii, PS3, or 360, and it has the best musical score out of any game this year, but holy hell is it one of the most boring and repeatitve games I have ever played. It’s getting a six, and I really wish I could score it lower, but the numbers don’t lie. Look for that review Xmas Eve/Christmas.

Not much else really going on at this time. It’s going to be a weekend of writing, writing, writing.

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