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Archive for December, 2009

DVD of the Day #357 - Netherbeast Incorporated

Tuesday, December 22nd, 2009

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This is the first movie I watched with the PS3 streaming disc from netflix. They sent it to me a week before it was available to the general public thanks to being the Diehard GameFAN editor-on-chief and since Dan was here we decided to see how the picture and sound was.

Netherbeast Inc is a bad vampire comedy about yuppie corporate isolationist vampires who company and product is never defined or even alluded to. You would think a film whose cast includes Darrell Hammond, Judd Nelson, Dave Foley and Jason Mewes amongst others would be…funny. Alas, it was amazingly slow, boring, and I think we laughed twice through the whole film. The first was at this bit involving early PC posters from the 40’s (Hire those cripples!) and the very beginning of the film where you learn the ceo of the company has vampire alzheimers and he has to explain why he killed this guy who he discovered was a vampire. other than that is was a very unfunny boring piece of crap and I felt bad that Dan had to sit through this with me.

At some point vampires keep getting killed and the CEO starts hiring non vampires to work here. There’s also a really contrived bit about who were vampires in the past and heart replacement surgery = vampires. Crap like that. I’d advise never watching this. It’s a pretty bad comedy, but not the worst I’ve ever seen.

Is it Worth Keeping? no
Rating: 2/10

DVD of the Day #356 - Dark Mirror

Monday, December 21st, 2009

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This was a bad netflix horror rental choice, which is primarily what i use Netflix for these days instead of stupidly buying every horror movie that seems like it might be fun.

This woman Deborah is a photographer who moves into a new house with her husband and child when he gets a transfer. It turns out the house has a cursed mirror due to a craaaazy artist that once lived there before he disappeared along with his wife. When Deborah takes a picture of the mirror, she accidentally activates it and becomes posessed by the spirit inside the mirror who takes her over when she is angry and kills people.

One by one everyone that annoys Deborah dies, from the sexist guy who didn’t want to hire her but did want to pork her, to this crazy lady who hits her car to her own husband. Eventually Deborah realizes it is her body doing the killing, even if it isn’t her mind and she has to find a way to stop the killings.

Hint: She stabs herself while looking at the spirit in the mirror, so they both feel the horrible horrible pain. Then they die together.

This was a pretty bad movie, with lackluster special effects and acting. definitely not worth your time.

It it worth keeping? no
Rating: 3/10

DVD of the Day #355 - Tinker Bell and the Lost Treasure (Two Disc Edition w/ Standard DVD) [Blu-ray]

Sunday, December 20th, 2009

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Note. This was something Amazon sent me to review, so here we go:

First things first: I applaud Disney for putting both a normal DVD and a blu-ray disc in the same package, and for little to no extra cost. This way kids can take the movie to their friend’s house without worrying which format they have.

Now. I’m a 32 year old male. I generally am not a Disney fan. The only Disney things I’ve ever liked are Lilo & Stitch or anything related to Uncle Scrooge (preferably Carl Banks or Don Rosa related). However, I was surprised at how well written and cute this was.

The CGI was pretty well done and the film looks great in Blu-Ray. It was a bit jarring to hear Tinker Bell talk as I remember her being mute in Peter Pan and her multiple cameos in other Disney pieces, but I quickly adjusted and got used to it.

The plot is simply but will be a lot of fun for kids to follow. Tinker Bell turns out to be a tinker/inventor in this movie and she is asked to build a new scepter to contain the moonstone, which is the source of all fairie power as it triggers Fairy Dust. Of course, things are never that simply and when something really awful happens, Tinker Bell has to fix things, save the day, and learn the true meaning of friends.

This is going to be a great film for kids, and the extras will really increase the life of the disc. It’s definitely geared for younger viewers, but parents will be able to enjoy this while watching it with their children. If I was able to enjoy this for what it was, and I’m more a horror movie and/or documentary kind of guy, then pretty much anyone will be able to.

Is It Worth Keeping No, but it was worth watching!
Rating: 6/10

DVD of the Day #354 - Oh. My Zombie Mermaid

Saturday, December 19th, 2009

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Oh Japan, you’re so brilliantly fucked up. This movie stars the late great professional wrestler Shinya Hashimoto as…Shinya Hashimoto.

Here’s the insane plot. Shinya gets married and invites everyone from Zero-One to his wedding reception. Unfortunately this includes a Western Heel who hates Shinya because he killed his brother. A fight breaks out between the faces and heels and not only does Shinya’s brand new multi-million dollar home get destroyed but his wife is knocked into a coma and she eventually becomes a zombie mermaid. No, really. She just becomes an undead fish lady.

Because Shinya is not destitute with home issues and hospital bills he can’t pay Zero-One employees. An evil tv company offers to pay off Shinya’s bills if and only if he can fight through a house of killers. Killers that kill all of Zero-One while he is training. Of course Shinya wins, but it is through some of the most hilarious garbage wrestling scenes of all time including “electrified koi pond death match” and so on. Awesome comedy film…if it’s meant to be comedy that is. I’m not actually sure.

I got this through Netflix and I know have it in my swapadvd.com queue for when it finally comes up. Can’t go wrong with a bad comedy wrestling film that’s as fucked up as The Calimari Wrestler

Is It Worth Keeping? I’m going to have to buy it.
Rating: 6.5/10

Review #326

Friday, December 18th, 2009

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Dark Fall: Lost Souls
Publisher: Iceberg Interactive
Developer: Darkling Room
Genre: Adventure
Release Date: 12/11/2009 (Europe)
Sneaky Legal Way For North Americans To Get it Early: Gamer’s Gate

If you’re a long time reader, then you know I’m a big fan on Jonathan Boakes’ games. Dark Fall: The Journal took the number nine spot on my “30 Spookiest Games Ever” countdown, and The Lost Crown would have ranked even higher had the game been out when I originally did the countdown. The Lost Crown would go on to win three awards from us in 2008, which included Best Story of the Year, Best Adventure Game of the Year, and Best PC Game of the year. He also helped out with Barrow Hill which was a big favourite of mine in 2006 and it too went on to win some awards from us.

So it may surprise you to learn that well…I really didn’t like this game. It wasn’t at all scary like previous games and I actually found myself bored for most of it, possibly because I had figured out the plot in the first five minutes of playing. So what went wrong? Is there anything in Dark Fall: Lost Souls worth experiencing? Read on to find out.

DVD of the Day #353 -Pokemon Battle Dimension Box Set 3

Friday, December 18th, 2009

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Another Pokemon Box set! I detailed each episode of this season in Pokemon Collector #122, which should be in all fine stores now. There are seventeen episodes and has it is the end tail of the second season of the Diamond and Pearl anime, so it’s really not for anyone. You’ll want to start five box sets ahead of this one.

The three best episodes:

1) A Lean Mean Team Rocket Fighting Machine – a return to when Team Rocket (and the voice actors) were fun and interesting.

2) Jumping Rocket Ship – This episode features some of the best Pikachu voice work and animation ever. Meowth leaves Team Rocket for the twerps. Well, not really. It’s a ruse, but Pikachu is the only one that sees through it. Hilarious Pikachu antics here.

3) Pokemon Ranger and the Kidnapped Riolu Parts 1 and 2 - This two parter is a tie-in with Pokemon Ranger: Shadows of Almia. It’s a fun two partner that ties in with the Pokemon Ranger movie and one of the bonus unlockable quests in the video game. good times.

This is a great value at $17.99, but only if you’re a pokemon fan.

Is it Worth Keeping? Yes
rating: 6.5/10

DVD of the Day #352 - Albino Farm

Thursday, December 17th, 2009

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This was a Netflix choice that I decided to watch for two reasons. The first is the name. Tell me that’s not hilarious. The second is that Chris Jericho plays a crazy redneck. However, both name and the Ayathollah of Rock and Rollah were unable to make this movie good. Hell, the movie was almost too awful to be called bad.

Here’s the plot. Three friends and an Indian exhcange student think it would be hilarious to go to the deep south and mock hilbillies and rednecks, so that’s just what they do. Eventually they get to the creepiest town of all. It’s full of hairy midgets, rednecks, deaf kids and an albino preacher. As they investigate the town and mock the sins against nature, they learn of an Albino Farm. This location isn’t actually a farm, but a closed off section of the area where crazy albinos inbreed and practice cannibalism. So of coure the intelligent foursome decide to sneak in with the help of local yokels.

Things don’t end well as you might imagine. Not only are the albinos super inbred, but they’ve begun to take on animal characteristics like dog faces and weird shit like that. There’s what is supposed to be a twist endings involving the village near the Albino Farm, but it’s telegraphed from the very beginning, so it’s not very shocking.

There obviously isn’t much of a budget and the acting is pretty poor. The make up for the uber albinos was pretty good though, but it’s hard to take any of this film serious as it’s so generic and paint by numbers that it feels like it was written by middle schoolers.

There’s no reason for anyone to watch this. Obviously Jericho was hurting for money when he agreed to do this, and I’m not surprised the WWE didn’t pimp this like when other wrestlers are in films.

DVD of the Day #351 - Yu Yu Hakusho: Season 3

Wednesday, December 16th, 2009

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As usual, this series proves to be a lot of fun. Here we get to see the finals of the Dark Tournament and get a nice big long battle between Urameshi and Togoro. We also get to see a major character “fall,” The return of a dead character and then the start of the next big storyline, which revolves around Yusuke’s predecessor as a spirit detective goes crazy and tries to destroy the barrier between humanity and the Demon Realm.

I really love about the characters in this, especially Kurama who is a pretty deep and fun character. I do wish the “seasons” by funimation were staggered by story arc, because this starts halfway through the Dark Tournament story line to halfway through the Dark Tunnel storyline. You can tell where the actual seasons breaks were in the original Japanese versions, so you have to wonder why they did it this way.

This is kind of like Dragon Ball Z but with more interesting characters, a nice bit of comedy and better fight scenes. Also a distinct lack of people standing around powering up and just talking. I also really enjoy the use of Yokai, or traditional Japanese folkloric monsters throughout this anime series.

Again, a lot of fun, and I’ve only got one season to go before I’m all done.

Is It Worth Keeping? Yes
Rating: 6.5/10

Diehard GameFAN’s 2009 Gaming Award Nominees

Wednesday, December 16th, 2009

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We’ll reveal the eventual winners on 01/04/2009. Until then, feel free to check out the nominees.

DVD of the Day #350 - The Boneyard

Tuesday, December 15th, 2009

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This is a mediocre documentary about two Californian serial killers, Charles Ng and Leonard Lake who killed over a dozen people and buried them in Lake’s yard. This is 90 minutes long and it’s pure reinactments. Oh my god, I hate that. I want a documentary not a, “Based on a true story” crap. It also doesn’t help that none of the actors could well…act. You’re better off just getting a book on the killers rather than watching this hour and a half of boring crap.

Ng then met Leonard Lake in 1983 and the pair are suspected of murdering between 11 and 25 victims at Lake’s ranch in Calaveras County, California. They filmed themselves raping and torturing their victims.

The crimes came to light in 1985 when Lake committed suicide after being arrested when Ng was caught shoplifting at a hardware store. Then police searched Lake’s ranch and found human remains. Charles Ng was identified as Lake’s partner in the crimes. Ng fled to Calgary, Alberta, Canada, where he was arrested by the Calgary Police Service on July 6, 1985 after resisting arrest for shoplifting at The Bay department store. Ng pulled a gun on two security officers, and after a brief struggle Ng shot one of them in the hand. However, the two officers did manage to overpower him and held him in custody. Ng was charged and subsequently convicted of shoplifting, felonious assault and possession of a concealed firearm.

He was sentenced to four and half years in a Canadian prison.

After a long extradition battle (see Reference re Ng Extradition), Ng was finally handed over to the U.S. authorities. Ng stood trial on 12 counts of murder in 1998, which he was convicted on February 11, 1999, of 11 of the murders, those of six men, three women and two baby boys, and was sentenced to death. Ng’s trial was lengthy and cost the state approximately $14 million, which was at the time of the trial the most expensive trial in California state history.

He is currently on death row at San Quentin State Prison.

The end. Now don’t watch this.

Is it Worth Keeping? No.
Rating: 2/10

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